Rays of the Sun
Imam and Home Life
Observance of the rights of a wife
* *
Imam always offered me the better place in the room. He would not
start eating until I came to the dinner table. He would also tell the
children: ‘Wait until Khanom comes.’ He maintained respect for me and
was not even willing that I should work in the house. He would always
tell me: ‘Don’t sweep.’ If I wanted to wash the children’s clothes at
the pond[^1], he would come and say: “Get up, you shouldn’t be
washing.”
On the whole, I have to say that Imam did not consider sweeping,
washing dishes and even washing my children’s clothes as part of my
responsibilities. If out of necessity I sometimes did these, he would
get upset considering them as a type of unjust dealing towards me.
Even when I entered the room, he would never say: ‘Close the door
behind you,’ but waited till I sat down and then would himself get up
and shut the door.[^2][
The Imam’s Wife
60 years of living together and not one request for a glass of water
* *
Imam had extraordinary respect for his wife. For example, I am not
lying if I say that in the period of 60 years of living together, he did
not even reach for food (on the dinner table) before his wife, nor did
he have even the smallest expectation from her. I can even say that in
the period of 60 years of living together, at no time did he even ask
for a glass of water, but would always get it himself. If he was in
such a position that he could not, he would say: ‘Is the water not
here?’ He would never say: ‘Get up and bring me water.’ He behaved
this way not only with his wife but also with all of us who were his
daughters. If he ever wanted water we would all enthusiastically run to
get it, but he never wanted us to bring and give him a glass of water in
his hand.
During the difficult last days of his life, each time he would open his
eyes, if he was capable of speaking, he would ask: ‘How is Khanom?’ We
would reply: ‘She is good. Shall we tell her to come to you?’ He would
answer: ‘No, her back is hurting. Let her rest.’[^3]
Siddiqa Mustafavi (Imam’s daughter)
Blessed am I that I have such a wife
* *
Imam was very attached to his wife and had special respect for her, so
much so that he placed his wife on one side, and his children on the
other.
I remember that once Imam’s wife had gone on a journey, and Imam was
missing her very much. When he would frown, we would jokingly say to
him: ‘When Khanom is here, Imam laughs, and when she is not here, Imam
is upset and frowns.’
In short, however much we teased Imam, he would not stop frowning.
Finally I said: ‘Blessed is Khanom that you like her so much.’ He said:
‘Blessed am I that I have such a wife. No one else has sacrificed as
much in life as she has. If you too would be like Khanom, your husband
would also like you this much.’ [^4]
Siddiqa Mustafavi (Imam’s daughter)
He would never pass on his work to anyone else
As far as possible, Imam was particular that he should not impose his
work on others, but rather carry it out himself. In Najaf, it sometimes
happened that from the roof [^5], Imam would notice that the kitchen or
bathroom light was left on.
In these cases, he would not tell his wife or anybody else who was also
on the roof to go and switch off the light. Rather, he would himself
make his way down three flights of stairs in the darkness, switch off
the light and return.
Occasionally, he would also want a pen or paper that was upstairs. In
this circumstance too, he would not tell anyone, not even his loved ones
the children of Martyr Marhum Hajj Sayyid Mustafa (Imam’s son), to bring
them for him. He would himself get up and go up the stairs to get what
he needed and return.[^6]
Hujjatul Islam Sayyid Hamid Ruhani
Imam is not crying at all
It was around Dhuhr on the day that Marhum Hajj Agha Mustafa had
passed away. Imam’s house was full of people who had come to offer their
condolences. When everyone had left, the Adhaan of Dhuhr was
heard. Imam got up and went to do wudu and said: “I am going to the
mosque.” I said: “Oh, Agha is not leaving his habit of praying
congregational prayers even today.” I then said to one of the servants:
“Quickly go and let the caretaker of the mosque know.”
When the people realised that Imam was going to the mosque, crowds of
people from all over also flocked there. When we reached the mosque
with Agha, the people who were crying and wailing opened the way and the
Imam entered the mosque. The people remarked to each other with
surprise: “What is this? Imam is not crying at all.”[^7]
Hujjatul Islam Furqani
I was scared that I would cry for other than Allah
On the night of the martyrdom of Marhum Hajj Agha Mustafa, a Fatiha
majlis (a service of prayer and condolence) took place in the Hindi
Mosque in Najaf, and Agha Sayyid Jawad Shabbar recited from the pulpit.
He narrates:
In that majlis in which Imam was also present, I narrated the
masaib of Hazrat Ali Akbar (as), and also mentioned it 7 times from
the pulpit, connecting it to my lecture. Imam sat throughout the
majlis with complete calm.
Agha Sayyid Jawad Shabbar had wanted to make the Imam cry with these
narrations so that his heart would become light, but he wasn’t
successful despite the fact that it (the death of his son) was a major
calamity. A number of people who witnessed the Imam’s state thought
that Imam was not crying because he was in a state of shock from the
heavy calamity. Therefore, after the majlis they went to the Imam who
had returned home and asked: “Agha, you didn’t cry at the masaib
today?” He replied: “When he was reciting the masaib he was looking
at me, and I was scared that if I cry it would be for other than Allah,
i.e. it would be for the tragedy of my son, and not for the pleasure of
Allah.”[^8]
Hujjatul Islam Sayyid Murtaza Musawi Ardabili Abarkuhi
Why is Hassan dishevelled like this?
Imam acted exactly according to all the instructions that he gave from
the start, and in actuality, was an embodiment of those very
instructions. He himself was the book ‘Forty Hadith’ that he had
written in his youth. Suppose he spoke about riya (performing any
action for the purpose of other than the pleasure of Allah) and
reproached it, he himself would stay away from it with intensity.
I remember one day my son entered the house wearing trousers which I
had patched up at one knee. Imam asked: “Why is Hassan dishevelled like
this?” I jokingly replied: “It’s the life of poor people, Agha.”
Immediately, his face became drawn, and he said: “You don’t want to do
riya.” I said: “No, why riya?” He said: “Be careful. Not paying
attention to outward physical appearances has value. However, if you
want to show (people) that I am such and such, it is riya.”
Imam said this sentence to me with the same intensity with which he
had, at the age of 30 years, written in his book![^9]
Fatema Tabatabai (Imam’s daughter-in-law)
I have come to wash the dishes
* *
One day, as it so happened, there were many guests at Imam’s house.
After the meal, I collected the dishes and took them to the kitchen.
Along with Zahra, the daughter of Agha Ishraqi, we prepared to wash the
dishes. However we saw that Imam himself had immediately come to the
kitchen.
I asked Zahra: “Why has Hajj Agha come to the kitchen?” I had a right
to be surprised because it wasn’t time to perform wudu. Imam rolled
up his sleeves and said: “Because there are many dishes today, I have
come to help you.” My body started to tremble. My Lord! What am I
seeing! I said to Zahra: “I swear by you to Allah, please request Imam
to leave. We will wash the dishes ourselves.” This was really
unexpected for me[^10]
Marzieh Hadide Chi (Dabagh)
A piece of advice to solve family issues
* *
One of Imam’s daughters narrates: “At the start of my marriage, I went
to Hajj Agha so that he could give me some advice. He said: “If your
husband is upset, or if he says something to you for whatever reason, or
acts badly, at that time don’t say anything, even if you are in the
right. Leave it until he has calmed down, and then say what you have
to.” He also gave the exact same advice to my husband.
In the beginning I didn’t give this advice much importance. Later upon
reflection, I saw that indeed the root of many of the family disputes
came back to this very issue. Therefore, from then on, every time
somebody has wanted advice about family issues, I have given them this
very same advice of the Imam.[^11]
* *
Hujjatul Islam Muhammad Hassan Murtadhavi Langarudi
Worn away bricks
* *
The simplicity of Imam’s house in Qom during his life was an indication
of his contentment.
It is well known that the bricks of the courtyard stairs were worn
away. A builder had advised: “Get a number of bricks made so that
these worn away ones can be replaced.” Imam responded: “Turn these worn
away bricks around and let them be.”[^12]
* *
Ayatullah Bani Fadhl
[^1]: A lot of Iranian houses have a pond in the courtyard, which they use to wash clothes, etc.
[^2]: Paa be Paaye Aaftaab, Vol 1, Pg. 50-51
[^3]: Paa be Paye Aaftaab, Vol 1, Pg. 92
[^4]: Paa be Paaye Aaftaab, Vol 1, Pg. 92
[^5]: During hot summers, Iranians tend to sleep on the roof of the house
[^6]: Paa be Paaye Aaftaab, Vol 3, Pg. 173-174
[^7]: Bardashthayi az Seereye Imam Khomeini, Vol 2, Pg. 249
[^8]: Bardashthayi az Seereye Imam Khomeini, Vol 3, Pg. 223
[^9]: Bardashthayi az Seereye Imam Khomeini, Vol 3, Pg. 259
[^10]: Paa be Paaye Aaftaab, Vol 1, Pg. 315
[^11]: Paa be Paaye Aaftab, Vol 4, Pg. 140
[^12]: Paa be Paaye Aaftaab, Vol 2, Pg. 313