The Child's Education in Islam

Seventhly : Freedom in Playing

Playing is a natural preparedness of the child, through it he completely liberates from additional energy. It is introduction to purposeful and serious action. There is in child the feel of this ability to deal with others, his linguistic, mental and physical ability. Through playing the child gets to know accurately the peculiarity of things surrounding him. Playing has many benefits to the child and it is compulsory in this stage and the preceding one. The children (learns customs through the means of playing like self disposition, mutual assistance and self reliance, playing add joy and happiness to himself and develop his talent and ability to create and invent)[^50].

Through playing (the child's psychology, mental, social and emotional development materialized).

The child through playing learns the societal criterions, emotional control, orderliness and mental assistance. It satisfies the needs of the child like love for possession..... The child enjoys while living in his childhood[^51].

Playing is among the necessary needs of the child that is why it is not possible to deem or see child not playing, even the Prophets and the righteous ones has pass through the playing stage even though their playing differ from others, in ways and methods of their playing. That is why some narrations came emphasizing the satisfaction of this need.

Imam Jaafar Assadiq (peace be upon him) said: "Leave your child to play for seven years ....."[^52].

A narration was reported from the Prophet (peace be upon him and his descendants) with another expression says: "Child are independent till seven years ...."[^53].

From the commander of the faithful Ali (peace be upon him): "Child are comfortable till seven years ...."[^54].

The traditions are emphasizing that the stages before the age of eight are playing stage and it is incumbent on the parents to grant freedom of playing without pressure or compulsion with exception of dangerous plays that is compulsory to distance from the child or to distance the child from it.

Freedom of playing means that the parents should not interfere in the choosing time for the play or its type or its method so long the play does not contradict general character and no gravity on the child or on others. Child of this stage does not endorse the parent to intervene in his personal affairs and does not endorse issuing too much order to him.

The best play to the child is the type he has chosen or he has created by himself or he discovered new ways of playing by himself or a special way he applies in his playing. It is then better for the parents to provide toys and other playing instruments for the child and should conform to his desires.

DR. Sapok says : (It is compulsory for us to leave the child to administer his playing affairs so that he can learn from it ..... we should leave leadership for him to follow what his imagination says to him, with this the play becomes beneficial. It is incumbent to be its instructor and necessary for it to submit to his thought, when he deem inside him that he needs the assistance of any of the parents to administer the occurred problems to his game, surely the parents will render the assistance)[^55].

The whole psychologists and educationist emphasize on freedom of play for the children (when children draws a special programs for their activities they should not be prevented from that because continuance implementation of the draw scheme without any hindrances on his ways is among the effective factors that build the personality before them)[^56].

The Prophet (peace be upon him and his descendants) does encourage Alhassan and Al-Hussein to wrestle between them. One night he (peace be upon him and his descendants) enters the house of Fatima (peace be upon her) with him Al-hassan and Al-Hussein (peace be upon them) he said to them: "Stand up and wrestled ..........."[^57].

From Safwaan Al-Jamaal he said: (..... Abul Hassan Musa, when he was young and a small Mecca she goat was with him, he was saying to it: prostrate to your Lord, Abu Abdullah (peace be upon him) took him and embrace him.....)[^58].

The Prophet (peace be upon him and his descendants) does grant complete freedom of playing to Alhassan and Al-Hussein (peace be upon them) in his dealing with them. Alhassan and Al-Hussein do sometimes (climb the Prophet's back (peace be upon him and his descendants) they have said: move (a word said to a camel) he (peace be upon him and his descendants) has said: Indeed! the camel is yours)[^59].

These types of work do repeats in the relation between the child and his father when the children will climb the back of the parents during the prayer that is why it is necessary for the parents not to rebuked the child on that and should allow the freedom for him because with time he will desist from it.

It can be comprehended from the Traditions that the Prophet (peace be upon him and his descendants) does facilitates this kind of activities even at the sight of the community.

From Abdullah bn Zubair, he said: (I will inform you about the most resemblance to him among his family and the most dear to him, i.e. Alhassan bn Ali, I saw him coming climbing on the Prophet's neck or back while the Prophet was on prostration position, he did not drop him until he drop by himself, I also once saw him coming while he was on bending position, he expand his two legs for him to come out from the other side)[^60].

The Prophet (peace be upon him and his descendants) does join Alhassan and Al-Hussein in their activities but his participation doesn't mean intervention in their affairs but he participates as one of them, the prophet (peace be upon him and his descendants) would do laid down Alhassan and Al-Hussein and mix between their opposite hands and legs and said: "The excellent camel is yours"[^61].

Participation of the parents or one of them with the child while playing is very necessary and it is among (the important factors that developed the child's energy most especially, he will become independent and personally strong)[^62].

The best way of the participation in their plays is for the parent to converse with the children with words and expressions they understand and to conform to their mental and linguistic standard, i.e. to behave as if he is a kid.

The Prophet (peace be upon him and his descendants) said: "Whoever has a child should behaves like a child to him"[^63].

The educationist has emphasized this reality, Morris Teesh says: (It is compulsory to behave with your children like friends, work with them, participate with them in their playing ..... converse with them with love and friendship expression, it is also necessary for you to know how to position yourself to children's level and converse with them in the language they understand)[^64].

Playing with children makes them to feel in a sublime position, it also makes them to rejoice and happy, it is incumbent on the matured ones to obey the desire of the younger ones when they demand to play with them)[^65].

Playing is a means among the means of educating and preparedness for a serious work. It is a (means of understanding the children's psychology and cognizance of their preparedness and means of teaching and training them morally and socially)[^66].

The children's play is considered reality in their sound disorderly conducts (The child in the course of his play express his problems and conflicts he undergoes, he then drops his emotional feelings towards the elders during the course of his play)[^67].

From this point of view it is incumbent on the parents to supervise the children during their plays without them feeling of being supervised, he will obtain full information in all aspect of the child, in their societal interaction, observing the speeches and excitements that accompanies the play, observing the child's method of expressing his desires, needs, fears and problems especially in repeating and increasing situation. He will also observe the child's conducts in terms of leniency, violence, emotion and disturbances.

He should also observe his view regards his parents especially when the child portray the role of the father or that of the mother. Though the supervision and observation will enable the parents to know his linguistic, mental and emotional development, and then comes the role of the parents after the supervision to lay a complete program for orientation and education that conform to the child's emotional, psychological and mental status.

Indirect observation and supervision have more benefits than that of direct observation and supervision through participation in his plays because child through direct dealings will conceal his emotion, view and his imagination due to shyness or fear of the parents.

Eighthly : Training and Distancing The Child From Excitements

Sexual education is the most difficult and complicated type of training. It is among the phenomenon that causes criticality for the parents. There are various ways of training base on the adopted method by the parents and base on the customs and tradition prevailing in the society or base on the level of the parent's perception and awareness that is why we perceive immoderate or negligence in the most method of sexual education. The children whether male or female do commence inquiry on issues concerning .

He will inquire about his creation in his mother's womb, why pregnancy is mainly for the mother and not the father? How does birth take place? Why pregnancy did not take place during childhood? Why not by an unmarried girl? What is the difference between male and female?

And what were the causes? And much other question. It is modesty and reasonable for the parents to considered all these question as natural, they should not show their fear to that and the better not to prevent children from these questions because he will search for the answers from other than the parents which will cause him tiredness, disturbance and anxiety if the answer are not satisfactory or not a clear to him.

It is upon the parents to completely prepared to assist the child with sensible and comfortable answers that will satisfies their inquisitives and to stop their inquiry after being contended and he is confident with it.

The answer should conform with the child's perceptions, understandings and level of his acceptance, for example his questions about pregnancy should be answer as follows (Allah the most High place the child in the womb of his mother) on his question regards , the answer should be (you are like you father or you are like your mother) or you tell him (Allah has created two different child from lady) the answer should be in a natural form far from anxiety and trouble rather in a tranquil form so that the child may not understand that his questions and the answers to it are not natural because it will prompt him to search for answers by himself.

There are desire in children that is compulsory to be treated tranquilly and leniently, it is not severe to use reproach or beating, the stages between three and five or six years of his age, children incline towards (enjoyment by putting forward his body to others at that moment)[^68].

Some children play with their sexual organ; at that time it is compulsory for the parents to prevent him from that but in a peaceful manner and to engage him with another thing. They should take care not to undress before the children, verily the great psychologist has resolved base on the reality of their experience and trial (verily the undressing of the parents and not covering the necessary parts to be covered do disturb the child) DR. Sapok comment on that by saying ( I suggested to every father and mother to observe that and to cover all necessary and reasonable places to be covered in the presence of the child and should not regard the issue as an unprompted disturbance as it may happen in some family)[^69].

Most children at the stage of early childhood from four to six years reaches a stage where their sexual organs create pleasure after that; there comes the stage of potentiality[^70].

For this the Ahlulbait (peace be upon them) have cautioned about the child sexual excitement in this stage and the best way to distanced him from direct seeing between the father and mother. From Imam Jaafar bn Mohammad (peace be upon him), he has said: "The Prophet (peace be upon him and his descendants) said: By He whom my soul is in His Hand a child is not successful if a man covers his wife in a house where there is awaken child looking and hearing there speeches and breathings, if he is a boy, he will be an adulterer and if she is a girl, she will be an adulteress"[^71].

Imam Jaafar bn Mohammad Assadiq (peace be upon him) said: "Don't have Sexual inter-course with your wife or your slave girl in a house where there is a kid because it causes fornication"[^72].

Child of this stage copy and imitates the conduct of their parents (he did what the parents does)[^73].

Hence (the preferred play before that action was that of the bride and bridegroom play)[^74].

For that children will practice in their play what they witness from the parent's sexual activities and they may continue that in the next stage of their life.

It is compulsory on the parents to avert from that and from its introductions like kissing and others.

Among the immoderate mistakes committing by some parents is discussion of sexual issues in some occasions before the children, which make the children to increase in their curiousness. It is then necessary to observe precaution when having sexual inter-course even in a situation where the child is sleeping to fear for his un-expected wakening because that creates impact deep inside him and remain unconsciously hidden.

It is upon the parent to supervise the conduct of their children and ways of their playing especially in their seclusion from one another. It is incumbent on the parents to protect the children from sexual excitement, that is to separate them from each other when they were sleeping by given distance between them, they should not sleep in one cover in which their body will be scratching one another. Many narrations have been related emphasizing this protection.

The Prophet (peace be upon him and his descendants) said: "You should separate between children in their beds for six years"[^75].

In another tradition from him (peace be upon him and his descendants) "separates between your children in their beds when they attain seven years of age"[^76].

The separation is general that is between male and male, between female and female and between male and female.

In our present period when there is circulation of cinema appliances, television and radio, the need to distance the child from sexual excitement is more severe.

It is incumbent on the parents especially in a country where they did not adopt Islamic system as their ways of life and exposed to exciting films to have additional struggles in supervising and protecting the children from watching this appliances fear from watching indecent films especially in the countries that view the best method of granting freedom to the children from future restraint is to expose them to sexual films. It has been established by the psychologist and the educationist the authenticity of the Islamic perspectives.

In this respect an American DR. Sapok says: (the proportion of prohibition made on us during childhood and those that we transfer to our children plays a positive role in liberating the child's intellect during the academic years for devotion, un subjectivity attentions like writing, reading and calculation.)[^77].

Consequently we see it that it censure the wrong practices in America, that is man and woman to undress in the sea-boards.

In summary it is upon the parents to answer the children's questions regards sex with tranquil without rigorous and to distance them from its different types and colors especially in the era of cinema, video and television.